Why...

it seems like a question that any sensible person might ask me. why do you do what you do? well i suppose the only real answer to a question like that is "i dont know" or possibly "God".

i hate to say it, but sometimes its hard for even me, to see my own heart. sometimes it feels like others know the deepest secrets and desires of my heart better than i myself do.

why do i hate war?
why do i hate prejudice?
why do i hate this american culture?
why dont i desire to drive a super nice car?
why, why, why....

i dont think i have the answers to everything, im not sure that i really have the answers to anything. however, i do know what i desire to do in my life, i do know that i want to do Gods will no matter what.

i love Him.

it sometimes is difficult for me to associate with my peer group, with those people around me that are my age. even if they hold a same "theology" as mine. im not sure why this is

im not sure why i have this deplorable hate for the things of this world.
im not sure why i love you.
im not sure how i love anyone.

but i do.

i love you.

i would die for you.

i dont know why.

but i would.

i blame God.
i love God.
He loves you.